2003-08-25 - 1:00 p.m. Fucking with the Yearbook The yearbook is always fucked with. Not all people fuck with the year book. Now I described in a previous entry about how my friends and I failed to pull a prank on the school, and instead I got a ride home in a police car while giving a fake name. Remember that? I wish I didn't. The one thing we did manage to do was fuck with the yearbook. It wasn't wholly unique to do this. I mean I bet every school had the pictures of kids with the computer altered hair, and the funny quote. There were actually three people who did this. One of the kids changed it so he was black and I think the school got offended and he had to change it. I just think if Michael Jackson can go white... But its not hard to get a funny picture of yourself in the yearbook. So I (we) had this crazy idea. I suggested that we put in a fake person into the yearbook. But we realized that the yearbook people would be on that like white on rice. They would also be all over a double submit, so we couldn't change someone's. They were sharp on that yearbook staff. My Ex-girlfriend was in charge of the committee and she was a wicked prude when it came to this sort of thing. Her favorite joke in the world was the following. Q: What did one freckle say to the other freckle? A: Nothing. So anyway, I really liked the girl at the time, and still do, but her humor was a little suspect. The way I got by with the joke, was to laugh at her laughing at the joke. This works really well in uncomfortable circumstances. Also I recommend the crazy laugh. Like, I escaped from a mental hospital and the idea of eating human flesh is making me laugh. Anyway. There was this kid who liked be known as a wanderer. He was the goalie on the soccer team. He had some strange quirks. First, he had this girlfriend who's last name was Herron. Then as our goalie he would be all pussy and only wear these long pants. His strangest quirk was his philosophy on life. He liked the idea that he was this chivalric hero who saved fair maidens and protected peoples honor. He didn't want to be remembered in the yearbook by either word or picture. His honor and soul counted on his ability to remain anonymous. So I suggested that we make up a quote for him since he wouldn't be submitting one. Check it out. I was a wanderer. My pant's my only comfort. My Herron my only companion. You can thank Dinguspie for that fantastic last line of numbers and quotes. Regardless to say "the wanderer" was going to be pissed. However we submitted this four month before the yearbook came out. Which would make him even more pissed when him and his "Herron" broke up in between then and the release date of the year book. This is how he found out. Let hilarity ensue. The Herron, after their messy break up, called him and thanked him for, "Saying some really nice things about her in the yearbook." He angrily replied, "I didn't say anything about you in the yearbook. What are you talking about." So he phoned Uncle Pumpkin who had nothing to do with it, and took him to task for the whole event. He in turn called us who thought it was the funniest thing we had ever heard, and designated Dingus to be the official "apologizer" because he was the nicest. All in all I don't regret a word of it. I think the wanderer is still angry. Oh but cats and kitten, the fun doesn't end there. As Dingus stated, we owned the yearbook. Despite our failed senior prank, this yearbook legacy went off quite well. See I (we) had an idea to infiltrate picture day. That's right. On picture day we decided to show up and get into a lot of the photographs that were to be taken. We got into a lot of them, I think 8 or 9 different clubs in total, but my ex is a clever girl and cropped us out of some of them. Also the scanned pictures came out bad, so I am not putting them all in. On the day the camera guy started growing suspicious after a while. We would be getting into everything. Class of 98, 99, 00; yeah sure we were in those... Outdoors club; I love the wilderness... Debate Team; Strike a pose... Model U.N.; Why not... Role Playing Club. If you can't see me, its cause we passed this one up. Our joke had to draw the line somewhere. The problem was that we pretended to be in every club, so ones we were actually in the camera man shooed us away. No I really am the treasurer of the National Honors Society, and Dingus really is the president. We are serious. I am the Vice President of the Model UN. For Fucks sake, why don't you bleive me. I am on the Ski Team. You're right. I'm not, but I was thinking about joining. We eventually had to hide in the background of pictures. It's like the Where's Waldo for my high school. Fortunately I wore a giant weasel T-shirt in the pictures so that you could see me. I won that shirt for not masturbating. But I digress. The school must have had some Waldo Fun with us. Oh Gump's taking a Pee in the back of the ski club. The whole group is doing a pyramid behind the band. That mob squad are on the other side of the fence in the S.A.D.D. photo. We had two crowning achievements. The first is the T.V. Club. This is group that we were not associated with and on picture day the only member to show up was the freshman. When the camera guy was like, "I guess no one else showed up for the T.V. Club," I (we) jumped in and stated that -no- no- -no-, the officers were all here. So we grabbed a girl who was on the Yearbook staff, and the freshman, who I told to, "keep your goddamn mouth shut about this." A click of the camera later, the guy asked, "Who is the president?" I raised my hand and filled out the sheet. They needed the officers and the members, and also a quote. A quote for people from the T.V. Club to read. I made myself president, Kerbang VP, Dingus was the Treasurer, and I made Tamar (the girl) his secretary. They would later date. I made up about six fake names for the members including this one kid named Joe, who I will talk about later. As for the quote; I made it up, and signed Dingus's name too in case we got into trouble That was probably the funniest thing I have ever written. I mean can you picture the look on the ACTUAL T.V. Clubs face when they seen they have been had by a bunch of no-names. But the crown Jewel; The Pearl of the Sea; the Money shot of the whole porno is PEC. PEC? Well you see we really tricked the school into allowing us to form a club. We had to do certain things to have a club, like hold meetings and accept members, and get an advisor. Meetings were easy, as the dork contingent would meet in a school and play Magic the gathering. Meeting adjourned. Members weren't a problem, but rather we didn't want a loser in the school joining PEC. This is why we called it PEC. What person in their right mind would join this lame club. Then to get an advisor to sign off on this charade, we found the skankiest teacher at the school. He��s divorced, wore tight white pants with little to no underwear, and lectured us about Strip Clubs. You can see his head floating in the middle of the pack of the picture below. Oh, you might be wondering what PEC's stand for. Well, so no one would join, we called it the Puritan Ethics Club. Only the cool kids could join. And people wearing wolf T-shirts. I am on one knee in the front. The rest are my friends, Needles, Kerbang, Hillson, Robert (6:10 JAJAJAJA OGGA CHACK), Dingus, and Trout. Just to highlight; we are the only club that submitted a graphic, and the advisor added the quote as a graduation gift. We all named ourselves Vice Presidents, since we couldn't agree on someone in charge. I actually put in on my college applications. Vice President: Puritan Ethics Club | |||||||||||
