2004-07-15 - 11:49 a.m. Mystery Writer 3 Mystery Writer X here on my last day as the �guest writer� � and what a wild ride it has been� we have laughed, we have cried, we have pondered and we have spaced out � all at Gump�s expense. Tonight he returns from the land of PA only to put up pictures of his trip and have a long monologue about how Philadelphia is interesting. To close out my stint here I would like to tell all of you Gump fans my best story. When on date, at a party or any type of social event it is crucial to have an interesting anecdote � some people prefer their anecdotes to contain a celebrity sighting, some prefer to subtly show their political standing and some prefer to use the anecdote as a showcase for their intellectual capacity. I prefer anecdotes that contain embarrassing features. During my college years, students were �encouraged� (ie. forced) to take two science classes as part of our liberal arts education. These elective science classes ranged from a variety of topics: "Drugs: Chemicals Used and Abused", "Scientific Methods of Animal Behavior" and "Age and Altruism". Due to my complex schedule I was left with few choices � the open times for me were Mon, Wed, Fri at 8:30am � 9:30am or Thursday 7pm to 9:30pm. Because Thursday night (aka Thirsty Thursday) was a crucial drinking night I opted for the early and evil Mon, Wed, Fri class � which was: "Quantum World and Relativity". The professor for the class was a bumbling old science guy - of course he was extremely brilliant � but would often wear disheveled, mismatched clothes and would lean back in his chair (once he did fall backwards). He was about 6�6�, unmarried with a fuzzy unkempt beard and balding � very nice guy though. My class consisted of all sorts of characters � since this was an elective, there were no physics students or any science-caliber students of any means. There were 10 students, 8 guys and 2 girls (I being one of the latter � good work kerbang). Of the 8 guys, two were in the military program rotc, one of was hippy, dazed kid (nicknamed "Undies" because of his lacrosse initiation of asking girls for a pair of underwear) and the rest slept through the class so they didn�t add much value � but I can promise that the room was not filled with the �cool� kids. One early, sunny morning my professor walked in with an object, he had found in the parking lot. He held up this object to the class and noted he was completely baffled by it. At this point, I look around and class and the few people in class looked stupefied. One of the ROTC kids holds it up and messes with it. The professor is going on about how he thinks its part of a piston of an engine but there are plastic moldings on the end that would melt in the heat. This object is passed around the room while I am in my own state of shock. Finally, the professor says after various theories that he is going to take it to the science lab to figure out the breakdown of the object. The whole time I sat there in amazement that no one there besides myself knew that an underwire to a bra looked like. And this is Mystery Writer signing out! Thanks for my lovely time here at diaryland! Gump will return tomorrow with his antics! | |||||||||||
