2005-07-30 - 2:37 a.m. Drunk Man Draws! (film at 11:00) Sorry to "trick" you into looking at my diary again. But I updated
Which I am going to start doing again. If you aren't familier with the review site...go look. Thank you.
And there was a mission. The mission was six different beers. The man�. was Gumphood. I was a man, if you wanted to call me that. But I like to refer to myself as �The One with the Beer.� Since I was the one, who was to be drinking the beer. Ah but this was no ordinary game that men play children. Oh no. There was a twist. What happens if Gumphood tries to draw a picture?!? One picture after every beer! Egad! Would I accept this challenge? Yes. I have accepted it on this very night! ONWARD! The first beer I drank was the Blueberry Beer. I did this because it was light and fruity and I was not man enough yet to partake in the real beer. I needed to infuse myself with the tastes of the nectar of fruit. The beer tastes fine and crisp to me like the teat of a wayward knight experimenting in the ways of homoerotism for the first time. I would recommend this beer to the curious.  The First picture I drew was that of the noble turtle in its habitat. Is it not glorious? The next beer I drank was the UFO. It was alien to me, and let me feeling out of this world. Had I the space, I might have beamed myself aboard more of this strange vessel of liquid love.  Again, the majesty of the turtle captured my artistic whims. This turtle was not draw with a steady hand, but I still felt its soul. I sought the brew which had spilled upon the land. Majesty, thy name is beer. The next beer that passed my sour lips was the beer they call Hoegaarden. With two �a��s in its name I became aroused by its foreignness. It frightened me, yet I begged for more.  So the turtle became my curious fear. And the Gump became the Gimp. (incidentally, how does he keep that head thing from coming off?) Mistakenly, I pressed on. The King of the Summer, Sam Adams. He made me wrought with excitement. The beer was intoxicating. I was hungry. Hungry like the wolf.  Turtles natural sexual enemy is the wolf. Only if a turtle implants an egg inside of the wolf, will the Gods take mercy upon our land. Sexually. Vagina. All work and no play, makes Jack a Dull Boy. Pete�s wicked, and his ale, Rallies me to new levels. While I didn�t think that I could make the sixth beer, I was cheered on. I was Rally Capped.  The Turtle�s life is never dull, and his day at sea is severe and harsh. The wolf pack must be tamed by the stamina of our slow and steady friend, for in nature, only he can satisfy the leader of the pack. The Sunrye was the last beer. And it went down smooth. At this point, my mind belonged to the world. If the world was a mental institution. When one drinks six beers in one sitting, the world becomes clear. It is an evil place. And after sexing, the sea turtle must accept his fate. He must fight crime along side of his companion to bring balance to the world. My pen was steady. My drawing was true. No other way could I have brought art, turtles, and crime fighting together, without the aid of my beer.  COWABUNGA! Seriously though, I know I�ve lost my mind, but I will submit that this has to be one of the strangest entries I�ll ever post. And or that�I thank you.
What it looked like to me when it was over. | |||||||||||
