2004-02-17 - 1:47 p.m. Two Funny Things Two really fun things. First: Have you ever order pizza? Isn�t that great! No no.. just kidding there is more than that. I was GOING to say, have you ever order pizza, and then like gone to do something else, and started to feel a little hungry�and then think�wow. I should eat something. And then the doorbells rings and the pizza guy is there and you totally forgot you ordered the magical cheese pie and you wet yourself with Pizza glee. NOW that�s the best. Actually my friend Dingus occasionally would order the pizza and just be so hungry that he would make himself a sandwich and eat it, and then he would chow some tuna, and then a banana, and then the pizza would come and he would be full. That always amused me, though he did save to pizza to his credit. And that is more than I do sometimes. I was reading this diary earlier and she was talking about drunk dialing. This is when you go out, get ridiculously drunk, go home, and your horrible drunk self thinks it would be a great idea to call any and all humans. Usually this is an ex-girlfriend, current girlfriends, or just friends. (or your drug dealer�) Well after the Patriots won the superbowl, and I was estimated to have in the neighborhood of 16 beers, I went home and started making phone calls. It was 3:30 on a Sunday night�excuse me. Monday morning. The first person I called was my girlfriend, who was of course working in 3 hours. I called to tell her two things. 1) That I loved her. 2) The Patriots won the superbowl. Yes. That�s worth a 3AM call. Not as if I hadn�t talked to her before in the evening. It was just I felt THAT was the time to talk to her. I mean, as far I can tell that she knew from our previous conversations that both the Patriots won, and I loved her. My next day phone call was very short and I wanted to her tell her three things. 1) I was sorry 2) I still loved her 3) I just puked. I was told later that this call was not needed since she figured all three things out from the previous phone call. The next phone call I made was to my friend Dingus in Pennsylvania. The previous superbowl experience we had was an extremely epic and wild story that I cannot relate to anyone of you in print, for it may seep to the media. He is my buddy. He needed, for the 8th time this night, a phone call. I do not remember this call, however I do know that the answering machine picked up. The next day I learned about what happened because of this. You see, I was drunk, and I mean drunk. I had passed out on the train and in the car (not driving) on the way home. So to do this I will switch to Dingus� perspective. He awoke to a phone call. But it was a dreamy awakening and he could not tell whether it was an alarm, a phone, or anything like that. But his girlfriend was missing. And then he noticed that the window was open, and there is a light in their room that is burning out and it flickers. And then my voice came on the answering machine, but I was so drunk and so frenzied that my voice could not be made out to my sleepy friend. His first thought, as my horse drunk voice filled the walls of his room, was that Aliens were in his house, and had abducted his girlfriend. She had actually gotten up to get water, and turn the light on, which he soon discovered, but for a time he panicked at the idea of invaders. And the next day he erased my message because it was �too scary.� And I don�t remember a word of it. ________________________________________ Go here if you are upset about the EVIL YANKEES as I am. This is my oxycotten. (I spell�em like I hear�em) | |||||||||||
