If you didn�t know, I am obsessed with the TV Show 24.
I have watched so much 24 that I am convinced that there is a 45% chance that Jack Bauer is the only reason we are alive right now. So far on the three seasons of 24 Jack has stopped an assassination, a nuclear bomb, and a lethal virus.
Season 4 he�s been battling much much more than all that. Lets just say the season 4 terrorists have it together.
Anyway, I wanted to share with you my �man love� gay crush on Jack Bauer. I will give you some quotes and perhaps you will see that Jack is a man. A man that America needs to beat the terrorists.
God he�s awesome
Jack Bauer : Tell me where the bomb is or I will kill your son.
Jack is direct
Jack Bauer : You're a good liar. But I've seen better.
Jack Bauer : I have killed two people since midnight. I haven't slept in over 24 hours. So maybe you should be a little more afraid of me than you are now.
[Syed Ali has said he's willing to die]
Jack Bauer : The only way you're going to die is if I kill you. Your bomb's not going off.
This is when you give up the information
Jack Bauer : I'm gonna need a hacksaw.
It wasn�t to get out of handcuffs
Jack Bauer : That's the problem with people like you, George. You want results, but you never want to get your hands dirty. I'd start rolling up your sleeves.
Jack Bauer : You probably don't think that I can force this towel down your throat. But trust me, I can. All the way. Except I'd hold onto this one little bit at the end. When your stomach starts to digest it, I pull it out. Taking your stomach lining with it. For most people it would take about a week to die. It's very painful.
The best thing is, on the show, they would really do this to someone.
Nina Myers : I never meant for this to be personal.
Jack Bauer : It felt pretty personal when you killed my wife.
[Nina is holding Jack at gunpoint]
Nina Myers : You didn't think it would end like this didn't you?
Jack Bauer : This isn't over yet.
[to Nina while he has a gun to her head]
Jack Bauer : You are going to tell me everything I want to know or I swear to God I will hurt you before I kill you, and no one will be able to stop me.
Nina was the only one who could really get Jack�s blood to boil. The rest of the time you think that he�s just yelling to scare them. When he yells at Nina, he�s scaring me.
Jack Bauer : You inhaled plutonium, George.
George Mason: So.
Jack Bauer : So I'm not the only person who shouldn't be here today.
This is why the show is so awesome. He inhaled plutonium
Kate Warner: So the plane has some kind of automatic pilot or something?
Agent Tom Baker: Actually no, it will have to be flown out to a very precise location.
Kate Warner: So the pilot...? Oh my god, who's it going to be?
Agent Tom Baker: Jack Bauer
Who the hell else would you want!
[Phone conversation]
Vincent: Hello?
Jack Bauer : Vincent, this is Jack Bauer. You planning on seeing Kimberly tonight?
Vincent: No way, man. We broke up, you know that.
Jack Bauer : I just wanted to make sure you knew that.
Vincent: Chill, man. I don't know where she is. You've got my word.
Jack Bauer : That's a real comfort, Vincent, knowing I've got your word. I also have your address. Goodbye.
If only Kim wasn�t stupid. She�d be so well protected
Nina Myers : He is gonna put a bullet in my head before I can say hello, and then he'll turn the gun on himself.
Jack Bauer : We'll make sure he doesn't turn the gun on himself.
Ramon Salazar: [about Jack Bauer] That man has more lives than a cat.
Michael Amador: You betrayed me, Jack, you were CTU all along.
Jack Bauer : That's right, Amador. You betrayed me, too, I'm just better at it than you.
Jack Bauer : I wish you hadn't called for backup.
Jessie Hampton: Why?
Jack Bauer : Because cops have to play by the rules. I may have to break a few with this guy.
When Jack needs the information, Jack gets the information.
Jack Bauer : I know you think what you're doing is right. But it is my job not to let that happen.
Jack Bauer : You have no idea how far I'm willing to go to acquire your cooperation.
And actually its not just Jack that makes the show awesome. I was really liking Tony Almedia and Ryan Chappelle too!
[Chappelle catches Tony taking a briefcase out of a cabinet]
Tony Almeida:
They're suicide capsules. For the people at the hotel. It's going to get pretty bad down there.
Ryan Chappelle: That's against every regulation in the book.
Tony Almeida: Yeah.
[pause]
Ryan Chappelle: Do it.
24 is the best action show that�s ever been on TV, unless you want to count the Dukes of Hazzard which I count as Comedy Action. Listen, Jack Bauer would never use a flaming bow to shoot out a tire. He�d use your ribbone that he just pulled out of you.
