2005-02-15 - 11:27 a.m. Where are we Running? This morning I saw a woman running. She was older, like in her 40�s or 50�s I imagine. The problem was it was hard to determine why she was running. Normally people run for 3 reasons 1) They are late and need to move quickly 2) Exercise or 3) They are scared and running away from something that could hurt them. There is also a fourth reason which is she could have been crazy. There was a girl at my college who would just suddenly burst into a spring without warning in the middle of the cafeteria or quad or a conversation. She was crazy. Assuming the woman wasn�t crazy, this bothered me because I figured that she was either exercising or running for her life. I figured that she wasn�t late because of the lack of things (like a bag or purse and such) that she was carrying, but also the strain in her face and body to run. When one runs for being late, it typically is the easiest form of the three and the least stressful to the body. However this woman was flailing for her life as she sauntered by me. That the thing�she appeared to be moving at such a pace which was too slow for running for her life, but too uncomfortable and fast for jogging. I turned to the clothes to help me. She was wearing an athletic looking purple running top, but the pants�jeans. She confused me. I waited half expecting to see some various FBI agent or Monster following her down the road, but I was disappointed. In the end, the lack of the purse lead me to believe that this was exercise. But jesus lady�take it easy. Incidentally, I wanted to talk about running for your life. When you are running from something�lets say a monster�to save your life there are only three options. 1) You outrun it. So the slow zombie is easy to outrun. The demon cheetah will rip you to shreds in two steps. So I am concerned with the average sized humanoid monster. See if you are in an open field and running away, and they are matching your speed � well shit � it�s a stalemate except you are going to run out of enegery and slow down and die. Now listen, if you can run up a tree, or throw a barrel or get in a car, or something like that�that�s what you should do in a statemate�but listen�here is the way to die. Trip and fall. If you are just slowing down and can�t run anymore�that�s a puss move. You�re running for your life, but you are only human and will tire, so go out with some class. Don�t stop with your hands on your knees trying to get your breath back. You�re toast. Just take a head first spill and pretend you broke your arm. Trust me�it will look a lot more like bad luck than you were out of shape. And face it�when a monster is tearing out you innards, well, you want to reclaim what little class you can. | |||||||||||
