2003-07-10 - 3:34 p.m.

Guys are Pretty Dumb

Guys are Dumb.

So is MSN

Would you like to know why?

Then stop reading. But I am going to list the Top Ten Signs that she doesn�t like you. That�s right guys. We are this dumb.

And girls. We are dumber. Just tell us. Be like I don�t like you. Hints don�t work. Let the list reveal the pea sized brain that is the human male.

10) She doesn�t remember your name

All I can say is if this is number ten, then this is going to be a rough list. I mean, if she�s like�oh hey you and I just started working maybe. But like three weeks into it. Forget it.

9) She is always busy after work

People do things. But mostly people don�t do things they don�t want to do. She doesn�t like you brother. She isn�t a world traveler.

8) She never returns your email or calls

Come on now. It�s the information age. Even people on diaryland return Gump�s emails. Its effortless. Calls, maybe. But emails are the easiest thing to do. Christ, I talk to Heidi.

7) She doesn�t listen to you

What was that Mike?

My name�s Gump; I was saying about that clone thing.

Oh sorry Micky. I�m out of town this weekend.

6) She doesn�t remember things you tell her

No really I wrote a letter to my clone.

You have a clone?

No I just wrote a letter to it.

Who are you again? Are you a temp?

5) She keeps ask about you friends

So how is that Gump fellow you always talk about? Is he single?

4) She contradicts everything you say

My name is Gump.

No you said it was Vikram.

Vikram�s my friend and Indian.

No you don�t have friends and are Irish.

I know. Well. I have friends, but I am not Indian.

That�s what I am trying to tell you Vikram.

3) She would rather run errands

Just as a note. I consider this I have to wash my hair. If she�s gotta go to the gym or get some sort of waxing, she still might like you.

2) She hides from you

I can see you, you are right behind that pole.

No you can�t see me Vikram.

Why did you dive behind a pole.

I didn�t. I work here. Go away.

1) She is married

I just wanted to see if I could sleep with you.

I am married.

Oh. Could you just flash me then?

Will you go away?

Yes�.well�. no. But can I lie?

My god. I feel really bad for girls if guys are dumb enough to need this list. I mean, for me, if a girl get off IM to quick I fear that she hates me. Are we really this dumb.

I try to think about what Jesus would do. He�d probably annul the marriage and then sleep with the girl. Damn you Jesus and your religious loopholes!!!

Here is the link

before - After

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