2005-09-23 - 4:32 p.m. Girls/Guys: The Wingman I have choices. I have several upcoming installment of the Girl/Guy Series including (but not limited to)
1) The Female Rule of 3
However, being that it�s Friday, and this is my favorite topic, I�m going with this one.
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I got a lot of responses last entry about �I�m not attracted to him, and he�s not attracted to me.� I personally have struggled with the embarrassed of my attraction to Jodie Foster. I know its not a crime, by why does it FEEL like one! Let me outline, to the girls, why I think that you have NO IDEA who is and isn�t attracted to you. This may be hard to admit, but I want to talk to a girls out there who have been hit on in a bar. Let�s say you go out to the bar. It�s a girl�s night out. You and your friends are out to have fun and forget about boys. Or maybe you are interested in boys, but you are out in a herd. A herd of females. So you drink a little, maybe you talk a little, you laugh a lot, and dance a bit. Sometimes a guy or two might come up, but you got the wagons circled. I love the girl�s �circling of the wagons.� Were there a cock-block T-Shirt, I would either put a picture of five girls with their backs towards the room, or a picture of �the mother hen� girl with an angry face scolding a guy trying to get with �the drunk one.� There are two problems with the circling of the wagons girls. One is called the bathroom. The bathroom leaves hole in the trail. People who wander off the path. The second is �The refill.� The girl that heads to the bar for the next drink. The male�s role is simple. Seal the deal with the one in transit, to gain access to the group. It is kinda like infiltrating the pentagon, but harder. When the girl goes to the bar, you must somehow strike up a conversation that is light yet engaging. This is one of the hardest things to do in the world due to the amount of guts it takes and the creativity. If you are to forward, you are out. If you are too bland, you are forgotten. --this is why wingmaning is employed� Pretend you are the girl. A guy comes up to you, and immediately you are interested. I�m talking about a guy, maybe someone you might consider above your level, who started talking to you in a bar. He�s cute. He�s funny. You were having a good talk with him, he was nice, interesting, and even better interested in you. In retrospect, maybe a little too interested. You talk, and tell him you have to go back to meet your friends. He asks to come with you. Wow, he wants to meet my friends, that�s cool. He talks to them, chats it up, is engaging and nice. He sees someone he knows, he waves them over. This is my friend Kyle And then your friends are mixing with his friends. One of your friends is talking to someone else. Another guy. You are happy for her, because you didn�t want to be the only one. You were worried she would be mad you left her alone. But now that she�s talking to him, you can turn your attention to your guy. The conversation is going so well. You guys keep drinking, and keep talking, and the night goes on and its great. He seems really interested in you, and he hasn�t made a move yet. He�s not that type of guy. The girl group is still together. Maybe one or two are missing. Off with other guys, but that�s okay because you are having a good time. Then the end of the night comes, he�s a gentleman, he doesn�t want sex. You ask for HIS number, or maybe you don�t exchange numbers� He says he�s gotta go. You were hoping the night would continue. It went so well. Then you try to find your other friends. �Oh Mary left with the Kyle friend� And then the question pops up into you hear, in the back at first like a whisper, growing louder, �Where was the guy I was talking to?� You�ve been wingmaned!
The wingman is employed for the same reason Rockstars sleep with groupies and Germany attacked France first. It�s easy. You simply match a guy who is attractive and charming, with the girl who will give him the least resistance. He�s not looking to get laid. He�s looking to infiltrate the group. To divide and conquer.
Credo: You take the Best, I�ll Take the Rest.
Now you carefully flash back the whole night. He wasn�t sexually advanced. He wasn�t too touchy. He kept his distance. He was a gentleman, and yet he was kind of drunk. BINGO A drunk gentleman is almost always a wingman. He�s pretending you�re his sister. He probably doesn�t find you attractive. Maybe he had a girlfriend. He was probably lying the whole time. You asked for HIS number?!?! You didn�t exchange numbers!!!! ***WING-MAN!!!!!!*** Listen: This happens all the time. I have been involved in many a wingman operation. And yet, I have never heard one of my many girl friends ever admit to being wingmaned. Maybe its embarrassment. Not one likes to admit to being second hat to their single attractive friend. Maybe that�s why its not talked about, but honestly, I think it�s because girls never.see.it.happen. If Men were Ninja�s, our attack would be the wingman. Girls make assumptions about men who talk to them. 1) They want sex 2) They want to kill me (I�ve been accused of this) 3) They want to talk to one of my friends. They never think 1) He�s just looking for a new friend or 2) He�s wingmaning me. Wingmaning is the I-Robot was to subvert the Female assumption process. Where as robots can�t kill or harm humans, they can harm humanity. The one man has no chance of scoring with your friend, the man pack will find a way to talk to your friend. I don�t blame girls for being on their heels when a guy approaches them. We are up to naughty business. But we are not without our tricks as well. And I want you to think. Please share with me if you have ever been wingmaned. Look back, search your history at singles scenes. One of your friends has been wingmaned in your life. You might have been. At a party? At a wedding? I want stories! I want confessions! And maybe this will make you realize that maybe you aren�t 100% sure who is attracted to you, and who isn�t. | |||||||||||
