2004-02-19 - 12:31 p.m. Ludicrous Laws Ludicrous Laws Believe it or not, I stole this from an MSN article, because it�s kinda amuzing. And I am not in a bad mood, I am just brain dead. The creativity circuit is on the fritz, which is why I needed the help of MSN to update today. On with the show� 1. LAW: It is illegal to transport a skunk across state lines. COUNTRY: USA / STATE: Tennessee Cuz we�z want our skunkies like our childs. Imbred. 2. LAW: It is illegal to taunt someone for refusing to participate in a duel. COUNTRY: USA / STATE: West Virginia I know every time a lily livered scallywag backs off my briskets and tucks his tail between his legs, I want to give him a verbal splattering. �Come back here you yellow bellied throat warbler.� *waves fist* PSA announcement for this law: �Dueling can be grueling, but remember kids, no means no. And make sure you don�t take any gruff. Next time Mr. McDooly challenges you to a duel for rustling in his petunias, make sure he knows the law. And if not, get a parent or guardian to notify the proper authority.� 3. LAW: There is a one-dollar fine for every instance of public drunkenness and/or swearing. COUNTRY: USA / STATE: West Virginia This would rack up some serious fucken double charges for me. A dollar is pretty steep for swearing! At least you can only appear drunk in public once a day. Do you think this was done to SAVE the citizen�s money from the previous steep fines, or to invest in a better community filled with slightly poorer foul-mouth drunks? 4. LAW: It is illegal to require someone to purchase a horror comic book. COUNTRY: USA / STATE: California Because if someone is reading in California it�s really scary. 5. LAW: It is required by law that you make a loud noise when passing a car on the left. COUNTRY: USA / STATE: Rhode Island Lucky for us that the state is the size of my cubical. And no, �the finger� doesn�t count as a loud noise. You actually have to roll down the window and call them a �fuckjob� 6. LAW: It is illegal for a bingo game to last longer than five hours, unless the bingo is being played at a fair. COUNTRY: USA / STATE: North Carolina State Tagline: We know that old people need to get to bed before 5PM, but in North Carolina all is fair at the fair. 7. LAW: A man may not seduce a woman by lying, and claiming he will marry her. COUNTRY: USA / STATE: Mississippi There goes my whole plan! I even have a tell her how beautiful she�ll look with a veil! �Baby, I know that I have banged your sister, mother, and pets, but I will marry you! Just take off your panties and bite onto this burlap.� 8. LAW: One must not collect seaweed. COUNTRY: USA / STATE: New Hampshire With the smallest coastline in the United States New Hampshire is concerned about their seaweed. The governor noted that people could soon begin to build Seaweed houses, and kelp cars, and then eventually a new government. Plus the Merfolk get wicked pissed when you take their seaweed. They will have nothing to smoke undar da sea. Unda da sea; darling it�s betta down where it�s wetta, take it from me! 9. LAW: It is illegal to wear a bulletproof vest while committing a murder. COUNTRY: USA / STATE: New Jersey Not really a big concern at that point. I guess the cops were just tired of that �taking them alive thing.� 10. LAW: Unless a customer orders it specifically, it's against the law to serve margarine instead of butter at a restaurant. COUNTRY: USA / STATE: Wisconsin Because that�s just a crime! | |||||||||||
