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Comments:
jes - 2005-10-14 16:47:56
good article. I like the point about violence and men. Now you know why I refuse to talk about sex (in the rated X way) on my blog. It is TOO easy to get people to read it. Instead of using sex to get $ you use it to get readers. Whatever, you catch my drift, I'm sure.
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Sarah - 2005-10-14 16:58:10
Couldn't you buy the diapers for the monkey at the same place you bought the monkey (I'm assuming that was the imaginary monkey store)? Also, I think you're wrong when you say you aren't a writer. In fact, I think you should write a book (possibly a self-help one) and become a gazillionaire and then get your own talk show. And then you could kick Dr. Phil's ass because he is an idiot. The end.
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Matty - 2005-10-14 17:05:13
In my hometown there was this pet store and the owner had a ring-tailed lemur. His name was Ringo. Ringo lived with the pet store owner but came to work with her so that he would not destroy her house while she was gone, despite the lemur-proof room he lived in. Ringo had this seriously weird-looking penis, which he liked to play with all the time. Like, all the time. Ringo did not wear diapers as they do not make Huggies in Lemur.
Conclusions: a) lemurs may be cuter than monkeys, but they're still definitely related to us humans b) do not buy pets with thumbs.
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Andria - 2005-10-14 17:12:32
Gump, there are plenty of movies that humiliate men, they are just not as popular, because they tend to fall into the bdsm/fetish category. I am a fan of porn. That being said, I am NOT a fan of all the movies with plots, and action, and actual "acting" (if you can call it that). It also seems that every scene now has to end in a facial, which I find disgusting. But to each his own. And how dare you refer to MY blog as the low budget porn of the internet. I find that comment very offensive! Ok, not really.
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Pfirsich - 2005-10-14 17:14:24
I think women are submissive in sex as a gift to the man.Well,and in marriage,too,I guess.
I mean,it is done that way:one is the leader and the other one is submissive to that one.
But,I mean,as a girl you CAN choose who you are submissive to!
So,I don�t think it�s unfair.
I also don�t judge girls who enjoy being subimissive at all! Not the least!
I think that�s the most beautiful thing!
As a guy you want a girl who listens to you and not just crosses you and wipes your thoughts away.You want a girl who respects your will and also likes that.
I don�t see why you see bad in this.
Sure,you shouldn�t pick a mean man,but that�s kinda clear...
It�s not about humiliation at all!
It�s about love,the girl is submissive as a gift to the guy,she lets him win.
She doesn�t have to! She does it as a favor.
I guess there is also relationship in which it works the other way round,at least on emotional levels,I�ve seen that.
But then the girl has totally take on the roles of the man,be responsbile,very reasonable,good,think stuff through...
The advantage at being the submissive one is:you can be irresponsible,cause the other one the guy has to watch ot for you.
Right?
So,I guess it�s also more fun to be submissive,you know,more pleasure!
Why do you think it�s a humiliation?
Of course guys want to win and feel like heros....but that makes sense,you don�t want your man to feel like a loser,cause he has to protect you,you wanna lift up his spirits and make him feel like he can do anything.
This makes sense,you know?
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alice - 2005-10-14 17:23:15
Youve just been watching the wrong porn.
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jennifer - 2005-10-14 17:25:00
1. One guy, two girls: This is something that guys think would be wonderful. Many men I know (and one I had a long-standing serious relationship with) have encouraged their girlfriends to explore this particular fantasy with them. The few I know who've managed to make it a reality have been disappointed in the end, and spent a good part of the experience as well as many sexual experiences after that thinking "Is my girlfriend enjoying/Did my girlfriend enjoy her more than she is enjoying me?" And 2. For my husband's 30th birthday, we went to see the "YOu ought to be in pictures" amateur porn fest at the Coolidge Corner theater. A very good example of why most porn today should NEVER be shown on the big screen. Down right off-putting, most of it. But an interesting experience nonetheless. You should go, if you ever have the chance.
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Meany - 2005-10-14 17:35:23
Holy fuck -- amen. Take that however you want. I think it's kind of funny that I'm a blogging addict and my husband wants to to have his own porn studio, though. Maybe we're more alike than I thought ...
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Kelly - 2005-10-14 18:22:03
(Is Pfirsich real? If so, I think he/she/it totally misread you. I tried to read the whole comment but I shot myself in the head about 2.5 sentences in. I'm commenting from the dead.) Anyway, Gump, you had a great point about the violence/sexuality thing. I think youre very much on the mark there. Great entry, even the poop throwing monkey.
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Kelly - 2005-10-14 18:27:31
Oh shit, I just checked pfirschs site. I want to walk up your dick with my fingers
like they are the feet of a caterpillar. ---that is the funniest line I have ever read. EVER.
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Matty - 2005-10-14 19:10:48
This one time I went to Boston and discovered that like monkeys, Gumps also fling their own poop. But I ducked, and then it bought me a beer.
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Infamy - 2005-10-14 19:16:49
"I wonder if the internet is lowering our standards of what writing can be, or rather what it should be." --- You're over-looking something. Most people's standards were already in the crapper. We carry on so much about how the Internet breaks down geographical barriers that we don't notice the other thing it does. It breaks down socio-cultural-economic barriers. Face it - most people are illiterate boobs. You just don't know those people. Neither do I. Birds of a feather, and all that. My friends in the real world, for the most part, are over-educated. But you and I both spend time with a group of people (all of whom I am very fond of) that span sever social strata - and if we're honest with ourselves, we know that thier standards of culture in general are lower than ours. I also know that I'm not supposed to say things like this, but it's true. Look around your life, Gump. Do you think any of your friends, any of your housemates, has an IQ below 110? Remember, 100 is average. A high-school diploma is average. I'm going to repeat this part: "We carry on so much about how the Internet breaks down geographical barriers that we don't notice the other thing it does. It breaks down socio-cultural-economic barriers."
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Infamy - 2005-10-14 19:18:39
Damn! A typo in the worst possible post ever for a typo to appear.
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awittykitty - 2005-10-14 20:28:44
I grew up next door to a famous porno film maker in California....the guy who made "Behind the Green Door". He lived across the street up a steep driveway. His house was surrounded by lots of trees so you couldn't see anything. I waited for my school bus at the bottom of his driveway.
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Kelly - 2005-10-14 21:20:14
I truly want to meet the person whose cultural standards are lower than beer pong and drunk drawing pictures of wolves and turtles having sex in a boat.
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jes - 2005-10-14 23:10:58
ha, I clicked on your porno "what do you want for christmas banner" We are such perverts!
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That Mom - 2005-10-15 15:50:35
Oh my gosh, I love what you wrote! I have only read what you wrote today, and my eyes were glued. I think you need to send it to an OP/ED of a major newspaper, because weather you want to believe it or not, you have a gift with writing!
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luva - 2005-10-15 17:21:35
i agree with Kelly (which is funny, since i'm a kelly, too) that pfirisch misread you on the submissive thing. i also largely disagree with her definition of "submissive." listening to a partner and being receptive to his/her ideas and feelings is not submissive. it should be a given in a relationship, for BOTH partners. it's only submissive if you don't expect the same from your partner, male or female. as far as sex is concerned, i don't think it's necessarily humiliating for a person, male or female, (because there are oh so plenty many heterosexual men who enjoy the role of sexual submissive as well,) to be sexually submissive, as long as there is clear communication between partners, e.g. a clear establishment of boundaries. i guess that technically, women are biologically built to be "submissive," in that women are ... um ... receivers. we're the catchers, men are the pitchers. there are plenty of other ways to explore, but i guess that's the original way. however, that in no way means that a woman can't be sexually aggressive or that she can't enjoy sex. also, in many relationships, what works in the bedroom does not really carry over into what works in other parts of domestic life. but, as with all things relationshippy, it only works if there is honesty, trust, and communication. ok, that got to be a bit of a tangent. as far as blogs are concerned, i see your point about blogs being the cheap porn of writing, but i think it's become widespread throughout our culture's media. i tend to think that blogs are the reality TV of literature/writing. i think that largely, our cultural standards have lowered not because we're stupid, but because it's really easy to let them STAY LOW. you can find a reality program on television at any hour of the day, if you have cable. and they do, truly, suck you in. and you can spend hours on the internet reading about the train-wreck lives of people who you have no desire to meet, because it's so accessible, and even though a small percentage of blogs are well-written, they suck you in. i think i forget where i'm going with this. next topic! PORN. so, yeah, it's dangerous in many respects that porn has become very no-holds-barred, and i agree that the US attitude towards sex is really restrictive and rather appalling, and is much more dangerous than free sexual expression. however, like so many things that are frowned upon in mixed company, the porn industry will always exist, and HAS always existed. the stuff we can legally pay to view now, has been talked about or explored or exploited for centuries; just not so publicly as it is now. while the gender roles in the sex industry are still hugely imbalanced, (men have the power, women get shat on, sometimes literally,) the greater accessibility of porn has allowed for women to become much more powerful in the medium than they once were. quite a few established female porn stars are now producers of their own films, and of others' films. there are film companies and sex toy shops that specialize in porn geared towards women. my roommate works for a women-run company that sells woman-friendly sex products, i.e., they don't carry any merchandise that is disrespectful towards women, whether in packaging, marketing, or use. as much as the patriarchy is still very much present in our society, it is more acceptable now to acknowledge that, hey, women like The Sex, too, and women like it enough to pay to watch it. i could elaborate on this forever and ever, but i think i've lost my train of thought. sorry, gump.
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luva - 2005-10-15 17:34:38
holy shit. that was really fucking long.
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Phil - 2005-10-16 21:35:28
There was a similar explosion in journal writing (and I guess porn) when the printing press became wide spread. All the talk of blogs lowering the standard of discourse is I think a little over stated.
The pre-cursor to blogs was pamphleting. Cheap one page screeds stuffed into letter boxes. My favourite was that Catholics are exploiting the worlds resources for the anti-christ. I sent a letter back and asked where do I as Catholic pick up my cut? The vatican is a 90 day payer.
The discourse has always been low but instead of someone in a pub saying "GEB is a cucking funt or Hillary is a secret lesbian intent on world domination", it's now on the internet.
The danger for blogs is its narrow casting. People are naturally attracted to opinions similar to their own and the danger is that lack of variety.
In the immortal words of Banky Edwards:-
"Variety's the spice of life. I like a wide selection. Sometimes I'm in the mood for nasty close-ups, sometimes I like them arty and air-brushed. Sometimes it's a spread brown-eye kind of night, sometimes it's girl-on-girl time. Sometimes a steamy letter will do it, sometimes - not often, but sometimes - I like the idea of a chick with a horse."
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Mary - 2005-10-17 04:12:16
Oh man, Japanese school girls seem VERY porn. The guys in our training group kept oggling them, even though they are so not up to ANYTHING wrong except wearing uniforms with fairly short skirts. But that is totally the norm here. They enjoy it because when they graduate from high school, no more fun outfits with short skirts unless heading to the bars....
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BigPimpinMBA - 2005-10-17 10:37:59
Great analogy. Now, can you draw a parallel between Bill Simmons and Gary Coleman?
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DanjerusKurves - 2005-10-17 12:36:58
(1) No male humiliation porn? www.meninpain.com
(2) Why are ALL porn actors "stars"?
(3) Deep Throat had humour? I haven't seen it. I have, however, read the book written by Linda Lovelace which details all of the abuse, rape, and pain she was forced to endure. Apparently, there is also a scene in which the bruises on her legs are quite clear.
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Matty - 2005-10-17 14:47:37
The talk about Japanese schoolgirls just made me think about a disturbing obsveration I had while sitting in front of a train station in Ise, the Rome or Mecca of Shinto. I was waiting for a friend to come get me, and was sitting for about 15 minutes peoplewatching.
There was this 15- or 16-yr-old girl in uniform hanging out in front of the station with 3 or 4 cellphones hanging around her neck. Periodically, one would ring, and then a car would come pick her up and drop her off again in ten minutes or so.
Once I noticed this, I saw schoolgirls with too many cellphones in front of a lot of stations.
You guessed it...they were working. Very sad indeed.
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Matty - 2005-10-17 14:58:00
That should say "sitting for about 45 minutes".
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Belle - 2005-10-18 13:17:53
Well, so much for the diary or fictional erotica I was going to write... Kidding. Methinks the porn you've described is written, directed, and produced by men. If you want to see porn where women aren't degraded, look at porn that's written, directed, and produced by women. Just in general. Exceptions to every rule, of course. Anyway, I don't watch porn. Most of the men in hetero porn of the male-produced kind have bodies I don't want to look at.
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mr grainger - 2005-10-19 07:41:24
I do think the internet is lowering standards when it comes to writing, however I doubt it is the most corrosive.
Think of text messaging for example..
It's the whole culture amongst todays people.
It seems to me that people setting standards are getting more softly softly as they can get sued for nearly anything and few people will revert back to a firm stance. Money, Lazyness, Respect..
It starts at birth among the current generation but was around before them.
Gradually.
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Petey - 2005-10-19 09:51:59
u r 2 fun-knee
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Katie - 2005-10-19 10:08:26
As always...spot on and hilarious.
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